Monday, April 2, 2018

The NRA Wine Club--Locked and Loaded!

Hello, I’m Wayne LaPierre of the National Rifle Association inviting you to become a member of the NRA Wine Club. At the NRA, we believe that nothing goes better with live ammunition than several glasses of specially-selected NRA Wine Club wines. Let’s face it, friends, if your weapon is loaded, you’re better off being loaded, too.

There really is a NRA Wine Club. It seems like the worst idea since the Edward Scissorhands Vasectomy Clinic. I didn't have it in me to actually join the NRA Wine Club and taste the wines. I think I'd rather put a loaded gun in my mouth. But I thought it might be fun to share the introductory letter I received from the NRA's Sociopath in Chief, Wayne LaPierre. It's set to ambush you over on Tim Atkin's site. Please leave your comments there, or, if you must, take your potshots at me here.



  1. No pun intended, but you have a missing link. Steve Pinzon

  2. Yup. Tim told me it would be up, but it isn't yet. Should be up very soon! Or else the NRA shot him, not sure.

  3. On target as usual, Ron. I was seriously considering coughing up some blood money for futures on a couple of cases of Ch. Dassault-Fusil. I drove by Premier Cru in Berkeley and the place looked pretty shot up, so I decided against it. I'll get by on Supremacy White for now. Thanks for the rec.

  4. Wickedly, devilishly, frighteningly on so many ways. Tried the comments on Tim's site, but none of the scripts were working. All timed out. Fabulous post though. You hit another bull's eye! Bang! Bang!

  5. Tim,
    If you like Ch. Dassault-Fusil, you might consider joining the KKK Wine Club--all the wines are white!

    I assumed from the lack of comments over at Tim's that the scripts weren't working--it couldn't possibly be that my jokes weren't. Thanks, as ever, for the kind words. Hope you're well! It's been too long...

  6. A true classic, Hose. It's evident you haven't "gone to seed" since your self induced cutback. I'm sure we can store these wines in our climate controlled arsenal cabinet.


  7. Thanks, Ziggy. I'm content writing only once a month. In one sense, it means I have to focus on one target a month, so maybe I'm more careful about picking a target that deserves my usual scorn and tastelessness more than others.

    I have a hard time liking most of what I write. However, there is joy in being the Fool, and having something of an audience, humble as it might be. Thanks for being part of that.