Monday, July 1, 2013

The World Cup of Wine

Welcome to July! It's my least favorite month of the year. It's the Gruner Veltliner of the calendar--some people like it, but, for me, it's just another endurance test. But at least I begin the month over in England at Tim Atkin's place. My piece focuses on my proposal that we have a World Cup of Wine, along the lines of what they do every four years for football, or, as we Yanks call it, That Sport the Mexicans Like. I think you'll find it a modest proposal, but filled with non sequitur. They were all out of regular sequitur, so I had to use I Can't Believe It's Not Sequitur. See. As always, friends, feel free to leave your insightful comments in England, or here in HoseMasterland. And I won't be here on the Fourth of July, so this is your only chance to hate me this week.

Tim Atkin MW


Samantha Dugan said...

Ron My Love,
Our only chance to hate you...and love you this week. I'm gonna keep making with the love. I adored this piece Love, lots of funny but once again, far more truth. Are some of those wines cool? Sure. Are they fun for the sake of discovery? Why not? But on the world stage those odd ball regions and wines are not going to measure up and are far more for some half cocked writer that wants to be a "wine person". Stop looking for the next new thing and start really talking about the cool shit we have. Or is it too passe to talk about Chablis, Loire, Rioja and Piedmont anymore? I mean unless we're talking about domestic wines trying to mimic those places wines? Yeah, I've never had this particular discussion before...and it doesn't chap my hide in the least. (Post rant deep breath) Oh, and I love you!

Unknown said...

What did John Lennon sing, "Imagine there's no countries... who cares where the wine comes from as long as it tastes good???
Vornography popped a head valve when I sent him a column from the Globe's Beppi C.. who wrote take a couple of points off if the home town reviewer was raving about an alcohol soaked, fruit bomb from OZ..
Mr Integrity seethed that a reviewer would never give extra points to his home country wine or ahem, for a freebie trip.. hahahaha, sorry that last was mine..

Unknown said...

I wonder what England's chances would be in your world Cup of Wine? You can tell us after you've safely left the country!

Thanks for skewering the famous and freaks with an equality of incorrectness. What about adding some bulk wines and making it more like the Rugby World Cup? Aussies, Kiwis, South Africans and those pesky amateur Argentines all Washaming away at those bullies from the south of France.

Quizicat said...

I'm bringing a vuvuzela to my next wine tasting! Traditions have to start somewhere.
This could be made into another reality show not worth watching.

Ron Washam, HMW said...

Hey Gang,
I was under deadline for my piece for Tim Atkin's blog and had no ideas to write about I actually liked. I sat down in front of the damned blinking cursor and began to type. I had no idea where it was going (I think it reads like that, sadly). But the first sentence, which just appeared out of my subconscious, inexorably led me to my rant about all the attention that is paid to wines from obscure regions. Ah, the creative process--it's just magic, ain't it?

Everyone who makes wine wants to compete on the world stage, just as there are tens of thousands of actors who want to be famous but simply don't have the talent. I'm as curious as the next guy about obscure and oddball wines, but I taste a lot of those at wine judgings, and that has cured me of worrying that I might be missing something. Other than my mind.

The greatness of wine is reflected in the classics, as is true of literature and music and all the art forms. Hey, read Dan Brown if you feel the need, but don't mistake him for Faulkner. Brown has the writing chops of a Doberman. Taste Canadian wines, but don't mistake their Cab Francs for Chinon. You're just showing your ignorance.

Now I need to get some real ideas for posts.

The Sommeliere said...

But Ron, July 4th is my birthday. Do you mean you will be in the ex-mother country and not in the US of A for it?

Ron Washam, HMW said...

Marlene Darling,
July 4th is your birthday?!

I salute you. And I'm not using my hands!

No matter where I am, I'll be with you on the Fourth. All we need is fireworks.

Samantha Dugan said...

Oh I see how it is now. I didn't even get a card for my birthday. I knew this would happen when you got your fancy gig at Tim' this is what it feels like to be left behind. No sir, not a far. (Sniff) Be good to him Marlene, otherwise I will tell the fish man to lean heavy on his scale and over charge you...I mean more than before. Ron My Love, just remember, I loved you...first.

Unknown said...

Faulkner's dead, man. Faulkner's dead.

Sommeliere said...

Ron, just reading your posts is like having birthday fireworks!

I will hoist a cup (or two) to toast your health and hope you come back from Britain before you start talkng funny!

Samantha, Pete the fish guy at Long Beach already does that !