Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Something Fishy About the HoseMaster

I love zoos and aquariums. (Yes, I know, that should be aquaria, but, really, we’re already wine snobs, let’s not be grammar whores.) I always have. When we were kids, my siblings and I could always choose where we wanted to go for our birthdays. My brother and sister always chose Disneyland, or Knott’s Berry Farm, or the local drunk tank. I wanted to go to the San Diego Zoo. As a kid, every Sunday morning I watched “Zoorama,” hosted by a San Diego TV reporter named Bob Dale, which was filmed entirely at the San Diego Zoo. (I can still hear the theme song in my head. Great, now I’ll be hearing that all day.) So I knew lots of the animals from watching “Zoorama,” and I wanted to visit them.

All this to say that if I lived anywhere near New York City, I would be attending Sip For The Sea on Thursday, September 12th. At the Central Park Zoo! How cool is that? A wine and food event at the zoo?  I’d insist they feed me from a plastic bucket like they do the sea lions. And I just might fling my feces at folks who annoy me. Well, there goes my invite.


Sip for the Sea

Thursday, September 12, 2013
6:00 - 9:00 p.m.
6:00 p.m. Grand Taster admission
7:00 p.m. General admission
Central Park Zoo
Fifth Avenue at 64th Street
New York City
Festive Attire
21 and Over only
Purchase Tickets
The Wildlife Conservation Society hosts its first SIP FOR THE SEA benefit to support the New York Aquarium as it recovers from Hurricane Sandy. SIP FOR THE SEA features pairings of sustainable wines from The Hess Collection with sustainable seafood and other special offerings from some of New York's top restaurants. This signature event will be a festive evening and an opportunity to learn about the importance of marine conservation in the waters around New York.
New York Aquarium

I’ve never plugged an event on HoseMaster of Wine™, and I suspect I won’t again. But when my friend Jim Caudill (he’s a big shot at Hess Collection, responsible for hospitality and squeegeeing the artwork) asked if I’d help a bit to get the word out for this event, I instantly agreed.

Sip for the Sea is a benefit to raise money for the New York Aquarium, which was badly damaged by Hurricane Sandy (oh, man, that takes me back—I once dated a girl I called Hurricane Sandy cuz she blew me at the beach). The event is built around sustainable food and sustainable wines. Don’t get me started. That crap gives me a sustainable headache. Tickets start at $200, but, hell, that’s not even lunch at a decent New York restaurant, which isn’t tax deductible either. And, I have no doubt, that Jim and his sustainable friends will be serving the top drawer wines from the Hess portfolio, and those are damned impressive wines. Paired with food from some great New York restaurants, served in the setting of the historic Central Park Zoo! Man, I wanna go, I wanna go.

There are thousands of worthy causes. We support the ones that speak to us. Zoos and aquaria gave me great pleasure as a child, and the work they do on behalf of the other creatures we share this big blue planet with is laudable and necessary. Sip For The Sea sounds like a blast. Just go. And, please, forward this to anyone in the New York City area who loves fine wine, zoos and the New York Aquarium. If you can't go, maybe you know someone who would. I'd take it as a personal favor.

And when you see Jim at the event, tell him the HoseMaster sent you. You'll get a much bigger pour.


Dean Tudor said...

What wine goes with zoo?

Or with aquarium? Something white? Should we be drinking white wine at an aquarium?

voice of reason said...

I will only go if they agree to host an event that matches wines with endangered animals...

I was thinking "Pinot & Panda"

Jim Caudill said...

I'd like to confirm that you will indeed get a larger pour if you mention the Hosemaster, and an even larger one if you pledge not to fling feces at anyone...and yes Hosemaster, your invitation remains in will call, although you'll have to figure out what name it's under....

Bob Henry said...


I see your post is giving "free range" -- sorry, free rein -- to the wags and their modern-day Swiftian-like "modest proposal"* to dine on the critters.

~~ Bob

[*Once again borrowing an aside from Tom Lehrer: "The rest of you can look it up when you get home." Sorry -- no embedded links here.]

The Sommeliere said...

Ron, hoist a glass to my old home town, Manhattan. You will have a swimmingly good time!

Samantha Dugan said...

Ron My Love,
You do gooder you. Be careful, that very big heart of yours is showing. I will sharing this with everyone I know in New York and all over Fcaebook as well, even if people can't attend maybe they make donations to this very worthy cause. I love you!

Ron Washam, HMW said...

Obviously, one of those old Verdicchios in a fish bottle would be perfect. And wear a codpiece.

Hey, man, you're a Fish! You should be milting all over yourself to go. How about leatherback turtles and Touriga?

Will there be feces there, or can you bring your own and pay a roughage fee?

I hope the event is a huge success, my friend. Despite my endorsement.

Thanks for holding the missing links. Evolution joke.

Marlene Darling,
I wish I were attending this event. I certainly would attend if I were anywhere near. And then I'd drop your name at all the local wine bars and see what plonk they forced on me. That would be fun.

My Gorgeous Samantha,
There are thousands of worthy causes, but to help a buddy, and other creatures that poop in the water, well, that's priceless. Thank you, and everyone else who helps!

Mike Dunne said...

This kind of shelling is beneath you.

Ron Washam, HMW said...

Where the hell have you been?

Hey, for a lousy 200 clams, I'll shell.

Bob Henry said...


Earlier you were "schooled" on infamous versus notoriety.

Methinks this "whip it" shill campaign is a DEVO-lution joke.

~~ Bob

Eric V. Orange said...

Hey Jim, I know of another site you might mention the event on....