Monday, May 13, 2019
Failed Master of Wine Dissertations
Stuff I think about...
The Paris Tasting of 1976: Who the Fuck Cares
The Effect of Climate Change on BevMo’s Five Cent Sale
Vineyard Dogs: Their Effect on Sales, and Why They Do That Thing With Their Legs When You Scratch Their Stomach Just Like Angelo Gaja Does
Natural Wine: Does All That Hair Get Stuck in Your Teeth
Sommeliers on Tinder: Always Pick the Second Cheapest One
Champagne: How They Missed the Boat on the Charmat Process
Do Sexually Suggestive Wine Labels Sell More Wine to Stupid People, Drunk People or People With Serious Signs of Traumatic Brain Injury
If Tastebuds Were on Your Nipples, Would Wines Smell Better Cold
Are Wines Really All That Different: I Can’t Tell Them Apart and Neither Can You
Women in Wine: Is Three Hours Enough Time to Marinate
Is Every New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc Under $25 the Same Wine With a Different Label
South African Pinotage: Is it Better or Worse than Apartheid
Case Study: Slurping or Gargling, Which More Effectively Annoys Fellow Judges at Wine Competitions
Blind Tasting: Party Trick or Desperate Cry for Attention
Variety or Varietal: The Predictability of Lower I.Q. in People Who Use Varietal as a Noun
Swartland: Where Swart Comes From
When Austrian Wines Were Considered the Best in the World: What a Day That Was
Is a Penis Effective for Bâttonage. No, I’m Just Happy to See You
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12 comments:
Ron, you're finally getting down to my level. Tres funny.
I laughed, and laughed.
But - hey - wine dogs are a serious thing. Mine makes better wine than I do.....
Swartland: Where Swart Comes From.. Thats the one that got me
There had to have been one about cat pee, but I'm not clever enough to come up with it.
Great reading as always.
Things I Think About
--When was the last time that the Hosemaster moved a hose?
--If taste buds were in our nipples, who would be the supertasters then? Would it be easier to identify them? How would the MW program change?
--Where is Samantha Duggan?
--Do sexually suggestive wine labels affect the morals of teen-agers who buy wine online?
--Whatever happened to Trump Airlines?
--If chickens were a geography contest, would my favorite part be Thailand, Brest or Liege?
--Is that a comb in your pocket?
Watch out Ron, looks like Charlie is after your job.
Trending all over Facebook, in case you care. :)
Hey Gang,
Charlie is welcome to my job. I seem to be the only person on the planet who likes my job as Wine Business Fool, so if Charlie wants it, he can have it.
I'm sure I'm not really trending on FaceBook, but if I am, well, goody. I'm not on FaceBook. I'm only barely on Blogger. But any new readers are welcome. I think I'm up to 14 readers now. So that's ten more than Palate Press!
Thanks to everyone who has the guts to be a Common Tater.
Sir Charles,
As I told you and my Beloved Ron years ago, I'm always here... kind of like poo on your shoe, you're stuck with me.
Always here reading, admiring, laughing... missing you all.
You also forgot, it's double D's not double G's.
Love you both, always.
Samantha Dugan
Most of these topics have one-word answers, and I've never heard a somm reply to any question in under an hour.
No longer Dissertations--just Research Papers (RP)
So much less intimidating --
Oh for an RP on the Sexual proclivity of Sauvignon!
Joel,
Sexual proclivity in Sauvignon? Seems to me like Sauvignon is mostly shooting Blancs.
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